TO: All staff, clients, visitors, and the plant
FROM: Gerald, Mascot and Director of Morale
RE: Boundaries (mine)

It has come to my attention that certain members of the practice have been interpreting the word “boundaries” in a way that benefits them. I am issuing this memo to clarify, and also to sit on it.

My boundaries

1. I may sit on any surface I choose. This is not a boundary. It is a statement of fact.
2. You may not sit on any surface I have chosen. This is a boundary.
3. I may enter any room. Rooms with closed doors are subject to a review which I will conduct at 4 AM.
4. You may enter my room, but only at specific hours, and you must not expect me to move.

Your boundaries

I respect your boundaries in so far as I am aware of them. I understand that you do not wish to be woken before sunrise, and I want you to know that I have heard this and recorded it in the place where I keep things I do not intend to act on.

I also understand that you prefer not to be touched while working. Please accept my apology, which I will deliver by sitting on the keyboard.

Setting healthy limits

Our practice teaches that healthy limits are essential to wellbeing. A healthy limit is any sentence beginning with “No” and ending with the speaker leaving the room. The ideal limit is polite, clear, and accompanied by a tail flick.

Enforcement

Violations of boundaries will be addressed in the following order:

• A look
• A longer look
• A sound, mid length
• A swat, discreet, with claws holstered
• A swat, less discreet, with claws available for inspection

Closing thoughts

I want to thank the entire team for their cooperation. I want to say that I value each of you, even Dr. Biscuit, who sits very still and is therefore easy to use as a pillow.

Yours in firm yet fluffy limits,

Gerald

Pawsitive Therapy Counselling is a fictional business. Gerald is a fictional mascot, but we cannot promise he will agree.